Real Talk: Understanding Why You Think About Food & Weight in an Obsessive Way

The whole point of healing a broken relationship with food or your body is uncovering WHY you have ended up with this battle with your body in the first place. It’s never about the food – there is always an underlying emotional/behavioural cause.


Usually it’s because you have fallen out of love with yourself.


Sometimes it’s because you have become disconnected to your own beautiful body.


Or maybe because you don’t feel worthy. You don’t feel good enough. This usually results in making poor health choices for your body – because you simply don’t feel worthy of feeling your best.


When you have developed a complicated relationship with food and weight – its usually because you feel you are fat, ugly and unlovable. That couldn’t be further from the truth.


Good news is – you can change that.


This is usually what causes a complex relationship with food initially:


  • Control – desire to control situations/environments that perhaps feel out of control – lack of trust in life.
  • Self-punishment/torture – as a result of self-hatred and self-doubt. Bingeing is a good example of this.
  • Distraction of painful feelings – being obsessed with food and weight becomes a great distraction of feelings that may be overwhelming you.
  • Not feeling good enough/worthy – feeling like you have to be ‘a good girl/boy’ to be loved and appreciated.
  • Perfectionism – if you ‘look perfect’ you will be more lovable and feel happier in life. Perhaps it will also make you more popular?
  • Competitive nature – typical ‘A’ type personalities – everything needs to be in control and perfectly perfect, at all times. I totally admit to being like this.
  • Need for attention/love – feeling ‘lonely in the world’. I felt this for many years as a teenager.
  • Familial – often disordered eating can trickle down from family members who have also suffered from disordered eating or family members who comment/criticise eating habits at home. This was certainly the case for me.
  • Societal pressure – seeing skinny models on our social media feeds fuels the pressure to be skinny in order to be loved/appreciated/accepted.
  • If you are at the point of depriving/starving yourself with food – emotionally, it is because you may be denying yourself the ability to enjoy life because you don’t feel worthy of it. You are so worthy, my love. You are worthy of the most beautiful and abundant life. I also didn’t feel worthy (not so long ago). I get you. I get your pain. But I promise you, you are precious. The world needs you and more of you.


My second book, Living The Healthy Life, and 8 week online program both contain detailed guide on how to heal your relationship with food and your body, for life. I hope these incredible tools help you – as they have me.


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